Sunday, May 30, 2010

living with uncertainty...

The past few weeks we've been taking life a day at a time. There is much work that lies ahead in the weeks to come, but much of it we can't give ourselves to yet. Looking ahead at this upcoming month I can feel a lot of uncertainty...Will we be moving or not? When will this take place? Will this baby girl be born in the middle of total chaos...with boxes and things everywhere?

I was wrestling with thoughts like these last night as I was trying to drift off to sleep. And then I was reminded of a quote I had read on my friend, Megan's blog a few weeks ago (she, by the way, always posts the best quotes...always so encouraging to my soul). I read it once again, and my soul was once again strengthened:

.gracious uncertainty.

“Certainty is the mark of the common-sense life:
gracious uncertainty is the mark of the spiritual life.
To be certain of God means that we are uncertain in all our ways,
we do not know what a day may bring forth.
This is generally said with a sigh of sadness,
it should be rather an expression of breathless expectation.
We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God.
Immediately we abandon to God, and do the duty that lies nearest,
He packs our life with surprises all the time…
We are not uncertain of God, but uncertain of what He is going to do next.
…when we are rightly related to God,
life is full of spontaneous, joyful uncertainty and expectancy

Leave the whole thing to Him,
it is gloriously uncertain how He will come in,
but He will come.
Remain loyal to Him.”

_oswald chambers


I feel uncertain of exactly what these next few weeks will hold. I know we most likely will be facing a lot of change...moving from our first and only home, moving to a temporary home, getting a car big enough for three little ones and having a third sweet girl born into our family...and change is not something I particularly like or am good at adjusting to. And I definitely do not enjoy all this uncertainty. But that is part of what living the Christian life is all about:

"We are uncertain of the next step, but we are certain of God."

I'm praying for the grace to continue to live just a day at a time. At peace with the uncertainty. At peace with our closing date being moved back week after week (its now June 15th, best case scenario...my due date is the 13th). I may be uncertain about all the changes and circumstances this next month may hold. BUT I AM CERTAIN OF GOD. And thank God he knows and controls and ordains every detail of my life, and he promises it will be good (Romans 8:28)... maybe not my preference, but ultimately for my good. I'm resting there.

2 comments:

Ashley said...

Thanks for sharing! I can't imagine how hard this is Jeanie. God is surely using this time to help grow you in mighty ways you can't see or imagine! We love ya'll and are praying. Let us know if we can help in any way.

Mindy Coleman said...

such a great quote. i'll have to store that one away.
thinking of you all these next few weeks :)