My Aunt Jeanie took some pictures of me and the girls while she was in town. How amazing to be able to say "Me & my girls". What a gift they are to me! It was eye opening to me today as I took both girls out by myself for the first time. I think we'll be staying home more as a result of this trip :). Actually, it wasn't too bad. I did notice I was much more tempted to be harsh and impatient when Alathea did not obey. I had Abigail in the car ready to go and came back in to put Alathea's shoes on and get her in the car. Well, she first decided to disobey- which meant me having to discipline her while Abigail was sitting in the car (not to smart to put her in first- but I am still learning). Then once I had Alathea's shoes on she started crying for her bunny, which of course I couldn't find. So I had to get Abigail out of the car so I could look for bunny. I've never been tempted to be angry at Alathea for asking for bunny- but I was today as her newborn sister sat in the car by herself. It was quite eye opening into my sinful heart!! Alathea has always asked for bunny, and I typically have no problem spending a few minutes searching for her. But now my "sponge is squeezed" a bit more with having two, and the sin that has always been in there is pouring out! The good thing is as a result I am much more aware of my dependence on the Lord to be patient, loving & kind with my two girls, who are such undeserved gifts to me. And I am much more aware of how sinful I am. I'm sure with each week that goes by I will become more and more aware of that!
I'm also learning how to love three people well. That sounds silly, but it can be difficult to feel like I am adaquatly loving Joe, Alathea & Abigail. Sometimes I feel stretched too thin...like I should be spending more time caring for one of them. I know this is not true, as God will give me the grace to love each of them. And I look at Moms with WAY more kids than I have and they do it well. Any advice anyone??
4 comments:
Jeanie, I totally understand what you are going through! I knew I had sin before Piper, but after she was born it was soooo mcuh more evident!! But you said it right, we have hope-God's grace is sufficient. At times (I should do this more) I have a talk with the girls about how much I am struggling and pray with them. And when I sin against them anytime I try to ask them for forgiveness.
I think our kids really see the gospel lived out as we sin against them, ask for forgiveness from them and the Lord, and then bask in God's gracious favor. Even though Alathea is still little, she will remember her mom's example!
I will be praying for you all as you continue to adjust.
Those pics are SO sweet! Thanks for sharing your challenges with us, Jeanie! It's SO good for mom's to just be honest with one another b/c you ARE NOT alone! If a mom says she hasn't gotten angry, she's probably not being honest or probably not very aware! BUT it makes ALL the difference in the world when we can TALK about it - bringing our sin to light, not keeping it in the dark, is serving ourselves, our children, our family, AND other mom's!!! So, thanks for sharing! I'm sure you already know everything there is to share ; ) I agree with all that Lindsay said : ). But EVEN though I know that....it's SO hard to not to want to BE MORE NOW (without the sanctification process!).
One thing that's been REALLY good for my heart is to read....God's Word and other books! I'm reading More Love to Thee right now....hands down, one of the most encouraging books I've ever read....as a wife and a mommy! LOVE it!
And....right now....you are in the hardest season of 2! It only gets better!!!!! : ) Let that encourage your heart! OH! And DATE NIGHTS!!!!! I think ya'll already do that ; )
I know you are doing a GREAT job! Be encouraged and give youself lots of grace!!! It's a sanctification curve right now : )
Aww when are yal comin to MD again? I can't wait to see her:)
That last picture Abigail looks a lot like Alathea! And I'm amazed at how clean bunny is in the other pictures...Kathryn's bunny is in much need of washing (the feet and ears are black! Gross).
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